Dragonfly

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So, as serendipity would have it, I captured a shot of this blue dragonfly while visiting my mom a few weeks ago. I always loved chasing them around as a little girl, but I don’t recall ever seeing one as blue as the sky. As I marveled at the peculiar color of this dragonfly, I gently rubbed my thumb over my silver dragonfly necklace I purchased a few months prior. I don’t really know why, but I loved it the moment I laid eyes on it. I even purchased dragonfly earrings to complement the necklace. The designs were slightly different, but they both were beautiful. I was so anxious to wear the necklace that, as soon as I made it to my car, I attempted to gently tear away the tiny price tag wrapped around the chain. To my dismay, the chain broke, and the store didn’t have another one in stock. However, after searching two other stores, I found the necklace. I’ve worn it nearly every day since. There was just something special and unique about it, and when I saw the blue dragonfly, it just made me appreciate my special necklace that much more.

About a couple of days after capturing this photo, I went to pick up my son from the school’s aftercare program. When I walked over to his aftercare teacher – Ms. M. – she immediately noticed my necklace. I had worn it nearly every day so I was surprised she hadn’t noticed it before. Ms. M. said she loved dragonflies as well, so I was happy to show her the picture I had taken a few days earlier of the beautiful blue dragonfly. Her eyes lit up as she too had never seen one that color. While waiting for my son, Ms. M. told me a heartbreaking story about why she loved this unique little insect. Growing up as the darker complexioned member of her family, Ms. M.’s very fair complexioned, paternal grandmother routinely shunned her as a little girl. Ms. M. explained how her siblings, who were more fair than she, were allowed into her grandmother’s home while she was not. One day, Ms. M’s grandmother told her that she looked like a dragonfly. Ms. M. thought the comment was probably meant to hurt her, but she said it didn’t because she happened to love dragonflies. However, she did admit that this deep rejection caused her to feel second best most of her life. Ms. M went on to explain how she tried to overcome those feelings, and it didn’t help that, when her grandmother died, she made sure to exclude only Ms. M. in her will.

I couldn’t understand how someone who was supposed to love and protect could be so cruel. And although this had happened to Ms. M nearly fifty or more years ago, I could still see the pain in her eyes as she told me her story. I could picture that hurt little girl sitting on the steps of a house she could not enter – confused and left alone to understand why her siblings were allowed to go into her grandmother’s house and she was not. I grieved for that little girl and the older lady seated right before me who was still wrestling with the sting of rejection. I told her to share her pain with God and allow Him to heal her of those old wounds. Ms. M said she had tried, but she couldn’t face the pain. As she looked down, I quietly took the dragonfly necklace I loved so much and handed it to Ms. M. She immediately burst into tears – shocked by this unexpected gift. I told Ms. M, that apparently, the necklace never did belong to me, and that I was only holding it for her. The necklace represented God’s love for her, and that it was His invitation to be free from those old ghosts from her past. I went home that night, amazed by God and how He works in the most beautiful and unexpected of ways. There are no coincidences when it comes to God, and I was thrilled He used me to send a message to one of His beloved daughters.

The next day, I placed the dragonfly earrings in a box and wrote a note to Ms. M. I told her that the real gift wasn’t the earrings or the necklace. The real gift was God’s invitation to free her from a lifetime of hurt and pain. I told Ms. M that God loved her, and He had arranged all this just for her because she is just that special to Him. He desired she live her life to the fullest with no regrets, and He wanted her to know she was never second best – that this was a lie planted in that little girl a long time ago. I expressed to Ms. M that as God’s eyes are on the sparrow, He has watched over her as well and desired to free her from the pain she carried in her heart. God wanted Ms. M to know how much He loved her – that she was His beautiful daughter – His special dragonfly, and His gift of healing was hers for the taking.

God has perfect timing. This happened a few days before Mother’s Day. I prayed Ms. M. accepted God’s gift and that this would be a Mother’s Day that she wouldn’t soon forget. It is a wonderful feeling when God makes His presence know in your life when you least expect it. I know neither of us expected what happened that day, but I believe we are both changed because of it. What I know for sure is Ms. M.’s story is the story of millions of people – living as adults but carrying the pain of a little child deep within their souls. For her and countless others, I wrote this poem. It’s called Dragonfly. Maybe some of us can relate to her pain. Maybe some of us need healing too. If so, be encouraged. God is able. He offers the same gift of healing to you. Consider this message and this poem as His invitation to free you from a burden you were never meant to bear.

Housed in the deep

Alive within soul

There is a child

Desiring to be whole

~

Crying out in silence

My pain is how she speaks

Telling of my sorrow

Of my struggles and defeats

~

The keeper of secrets

She alone was there

When that seed was sown

Reaping fruit she couldn’t bear

~M.

Until next time, remember, with God, there is always hope.

With the greatest love,

Always,

~M.

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